The goat 2 |
To comfort himself, he drank a pint of Old Granddad
and beat me like a slice of beef.
I screamed: -Send me back to the hills of Europe!
He just shook his head and said, "Nope!
No one will ever leave me again!
To make sure, he put on this 3-foot rope.
Present day, I've been on the truck for 51 years.
My only friend is the AM radio
Sometimes the neighborhood children stop by
but it's always rocks and beer bottles they throw.
At first they're excited to see a talking goat.
They gather around to hear what I have to say
But I guess sometimes my stories went on too long
so they leave and giggled: -I need a bidet!
But you know there was a night that I did get off the truck.
When the Old Man was passed out drunk.
Three neightborhood kids took me to a rock 'n roll concert.
The kind of music, old-school funk
It was the first time I got off the truck
and the music made me lose control
The lead singer asked if we were having fun
I said: -Play that rock 'n roll!
The women at the show were beautiful
as they danced sexily on the soft grass.
One of them even petted my fur
Then some long-haired guys grabbed me by the horns
and threw me in the pit.
They passed me around and treated me nice
until I nerviously sprayed them with shit!
Then the music stopped
and everything was quite.
Then all the rock 'n rollers started a fucking goat-riot
Kill the goat!
Kill the goat!
Kill the goat!
Kill the goat!
They chased me under the bleachers,
chased me onto the street
and chased me into an alley
They said: -You will soon be dead goat meat!
But then I saw a sight
that I never thought I'd see
The Old Man swinging his hickory stick.
But he wasn't swinging at me
-You pot-smoking turkeys!
Don't you press your luck!
The long hairs ran away screaming
as I climbed up onto the truck.
When we got home, the Old Man said:
-Goat, you broke the sacred law.
-No! Please! Sorry! Shit!
-I'll let it go this time, but if you leave again
I'll break your jaw!
-Super! Great! Okay!
”Thank you Old Man, for saving my life.
Thank you again and again.
You could have let them barbeque me,
but you acted like a friend"
-I'm not your friend, I don't even like you
I'm just not drunk," he said
To prove his point, he drank a bottle of grain alcohol
and beat the shit out of my tailbone.
I'll probably never walk straight again
I guess you'd call me a scapegoat
a punching bag for the Old Man to mock.
Just because his wife left him
for his brother's large c….
He could have been my buddy
but instead he's a crazy old fuck
And, once again, I go to sleep in my eternal home
the back of the pick-up truck……
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